Comfortable in my own skin II. Feb, 9th, 2010

Bill Parcells a great football coach once said, “if they expect you to cook the dinner, they should at least let you shop for the groceries”. He was referring to a question that asked if coaches should have an input in player personnel. What is happening today to me is, I have been out in a position where people are bringing me the meal, insisting I taste it, asking me how to make is taste better, but refusing to let me anywhere the kitchen when it’s being cooked. This craziness is further strengthened by the fact that people are at labeling the enemy with one hand and asking for my help with the other. If you don’t like me that is fine I can live with that at the end of the day, but don’t act like a friend when you need a friend and a bitch every other time. If they expect you to cook the dinner, they should at least let you shop for the groceries.

Four feet of snow slowed things down in New York City, a foot of snow was an afterthought. At Hampton University a foot of snow closed school for a day, and delayed it for another. In NYC people get sued for not shoveling sidewalks, at Hampton University, pockets of ice and snow where left untouched where people had to walk for a week. Crazy.

The Thing that usually happens when I break up with someone is that I start to doubt myself. What did I do, did I treat her right, where do I need to improve. Truth is, I don’t think any amount of rightness could have saved me this time. We managed to both somehow evolve to a stage where we wanted exactly what the other person was not willing to give. I’m not going to doubt myself; I know I know how to treat a women, well. Yea I am a busy person, but it always gets me how on one hand a female will say that she wants a man that is about stuff, and on the other hand she wants a man that can drop everything and give here attention. You want what you can’t have and you expect me to meet an unmatchable standard. Because the minute I am able to provide your needs, they will change, they will evolve, they will grow.   And then what do you really want me to do.

Questions 4 the Week of 2/07/10

1. Why do students smoke everyday and then complain that they broke?
2. Why do girls not know what they want?
3. Why do girls let their friends determine what goes on in a relationship?
4. Why do students at HU not respect and appreciate their Greeks, but still expect them to do things?
5. Why does everyone else seem to have more time than I do?
6. Why are people so afraid to be part of something different nowadays?
7. What is the point of Valentine’s Day for a single man?
8. What does black History Mean to me?
9. What is the State of the Black man and women?
10. What is the State of the Black Greek?

This weeks Answers

1. Why did I take so long to start blogging again?

A lot been going on in my life, and not going on in my life. Last fall was a trying time, and this summer was one of the busiest I have ever had. I’m trying to do a lot cause I need to and I want to. So blogging just was not on the radar. But now I’m back because I realized that it helps me to know where my life is when it is out of control. So many things are happening at the same time, it just helps to write about it.

2. What is love?

Love is that thing you feel when you know that this here matters more than anything else, all the time. Love is sacrifice made easy. Love is uncompromising in what it ask for, and unwilling to give into anything. And that is why it is so hard…to love or be loved……

3. What are people so afraid to stand up for the truth?

People are not afraid to stand up for the truth, people are afraid to stand up alone, but the truth often finds itself alone. Cause a lie is easy, and easy easily finds company.

4. Is the easy way out really that popular nowadays?

It is. Nowadays people are looking for the easy way out. You will often hear people say why do I have to do that, as suppose to I like a challenge. Our race, and the youth of our race is turning away from the ideal that struggle creates character and turning to a attitude that we somehow are entitled to what the former generation fought for.

5. Why do people at Hampton University elect Student Leaders and place people in Student Leader Programs that are so afraid to lead?

Because Hampton University is more about the image than actual. We at this school are far more concerned with how something looks than what it actually intends to be. So rather than foster actually leadership which is hard, we will manufacture cosmetic following of followers, which is a lot easier. Hampton University at times is more like 13^th grade, than an institution of higher learning. We think being pretty and having a good time is leading. We live in a fantasy world and anyone that attacks that bubble is wrong. It leads to cookie cut leadership and people that are more skilled are putting on a show than doing a job.

6. Why is the south in the USA so resistant to change?

It is the traditionalist political culture of the south that makes it so resistant to change. Where most parts of the country fights against compliancy, the south is too often comfortable.

7. Why is it so hard to be happy, when you are tying to do the right thing?

Cause if its was easy it would not make you happy.

8. Is it better to have loved and lost than to have not have loved at all?

It is. Every experience in life is lessons learned so do not be afraid of learning the lesson that come from failure, hurt, and loss. You will not get love right unless you first learn what it is that you do to get it wrong. It is unfortunate that we have to go through that, but it is the truth.

9. Does the State of the Union really matter?

No. What matters is what happens in the year between one State of the Union and another.

10. What happened to a time where people kept there word?

People don’t put as much stock in themselves anymore. Everything is about other people. How they see you, how they feel, what they will think about your actions. When this happens, when others are more influential in your everyday life than even yourself, your word means very little to you.

Freedom is not free……

Comfortable in my own skin I. Jan, 31st, 2010

Much has been made about the whole Hampton possible banning leggings issue. Let me say first at no time, ever was Hampton University or any one that runs Hampton University considering the banning of leggings or tights. In fact I think the opposition against this ghost policy was taken more serious than the policy that was never going to happen itself. I do, however, want to speak on the aftermath of the issue. You see the way I see it is, it is the blame Greeks or Greek representation for the outbreak of mis-truth, but that is just not the case. How it got the way it got, IDK, however I do know that at this state the ones being attack, the ones open for blame, are the ones doing the work that needs to be done. While the ones that do nothing, hide comfortably behind the fact that it couldn’t be them, I do nothing anyway for it to have been me. And even that, is not really true.

#irememberwhen respect was earned not given. I was asked the question what I thought about people that join certain organizations Greek and non-Greek, and than all of a sudden are IT. My response was that the same coulod be said about me. However, the difference is once you are there, whether you ran there, crawled thier, fought to get thier, got there cause of who you knew, who your parents are, once you are in the hot seat, it is what you do from that point on that will be your legacy. Nothing else. Few people know the story about you, that you have not written. More know what you have done since you put yourself out.

It is amazing to me the lack of stock put in the worth of a person’s word today. I am only 21 and I say times have changed. There was a point that I knew if I said it I was wed to it. Cause it was not the person who I gave the word to fault, it was mine for offering them the security of my promise. People thought before they spoke, they thought more before they promised. Now, it seems to me that the majority of people don’t know the power, don’t realize the consequence, or just don’t care enough to stand by there word..

The problem with Hampton University today is not that people are not going to events. The problem is that students feel that they don’t have to, but still expect “someone else” to make their school popping. To many people are setting back expecting something to happen. Expecting the system to jump into place and their desires fulfilled. My questions is if you don’t try and do it, how can you expect anyone else 2..

Finally much has been made about my house negro comments at the Blue and White (well attended) seminar more then a week ago. Let me say this, I have no fear of calling people out by name, and will do so if necessary. My comments where meant for no one person or group. However, if you are offended, maybe your enemy is the image in the mirror not me. As the shoe fits the saying foes. Malcolm X in his message to the grassroots stated that a house negro is one that loved master more then he loved the field. They protected master, defended the house as if it was their own, yet they where slaves. They where in the minority of the minority, ate good, dressed pretty, and in exchange for was out of touch with the negro of the filed. I submit that at Hampton University some students have lost touch with the filed for whatever reason, they are a minority in a minority and there success has come on the backs of the majority of students that have real problems here at our home by the see.

Questions 4 the Week of 1/31/10

1. Why did I take so long to start blogging again?

2. What is love?

3. What are people so afraid to stand up for the truth?

4. Is the easy way out really that popular nowadays?

5. Why do people at Hampton University elect Student Leaders and place people in Student Leader Programs that are so afraid to lead?

6. Why is the south in the USA so resistant to change?

7. Why is it so hard to be happy, when you are tying to do the right thing?

8. Is it better to have loved and lost than to have not have loved at all?

9. Does the State of the Union really matter?

10. What happened to a time where people kept there word?

Defense of Porn

Some people would call anyone who does not keep their sexual views to themselves a straight pervert. Then again, most people are sheep. So I thought I’d take this opportunity to tell the world why enjoy pornography. More specifically why I think it is ok to say I like pornography.

First, let me define what I am talking about when I say pornography. I am not talking about prostitution (Even though I find very little difference between a porn star and a prostitute, and I believe prostitution should be legal and government regulated.) We are not talking about child porn, bestiality, or anything that clearly crosses the line from entertainment and free speech to sickness. The average porn film or scene is nothing more than a camera recording a natural action that was used to bring us all into this world. What we are talking about is simply visual display of sex used to stimulate the mind. Not that much different from the widely accepted striptease.

So why do I like porn? It looks good. The lights, the actors, everything adds to the production. It is a lot better than anything I could produce in my dorm room or at a cheap, unlit motel.

It feels good. I like the felling of having an erection. I enjoy the felling when I ejaculate, and if porn helps me get there then I like it. (Yes, I like to bust a nut once in a while. In fact I feel like I need to once in a while, any man who says I’m crazy is lying. I’m just saying what you want to say but can’t.)

It sounds good. Even though the actors are essentially playing a made up role, they express themselves in ways that I would never think of on my own. Porn gives me ideas. It forces me to keep my game up in the art of pleasing females like I was designed to do. It is always new, usually well thought out, and often creative. A real good porn scene is often like a very good meal. If it is well made it is what it is. It may not be 100% good for you, but for those 10-15 minutes you really don’t care and it’s alright. Pornography does not kill, it’s not mind altering in most cases, it can’t cause cancer, it won’t bankrupt you can control yourself; all in all it is a pretty safe vice.

So why don’t more people admit they like porn? This country has a big problem and the problem is we do not teach our children or ourselves the difference between sexual fantasy and sexual reality. Porn is strictly sexual fantasy.

Response to “Fox News…you guys are cunts”

http://thet-word.blogspot.com/2008/06/fox-newsyou-guys-are-cunts.html

The funny thing is that your bias is clearly shown in your critique of a so called bias network. If Fox News is so bad why does it lead all networks in ratings? If it is so bad who’s watching. Your right its extreme punditing and people are allowed mistakes. However, take away all the stuff fox talks about, what is there left? MSNBC, an equally as biased liberal network could be described as bad as you destroy on the flip side why don’t you write about them? The truth is liberal have their networks and conservatives have theirs. The real issue that no one addresses in that there are more conservatives in this country, which is why Fox exist. Not to support the KKK. If more black people watched Fox maybe Barak would get better coverage. If more black people were Republicans, maybe we as a race wouldn’t be at the living mercy of the Democratic Party.

Letter to the Incoming Class of 2012 to Hampton University

Empathy is defined as the mental process of identifying with the character and experiences of another person. Although the word is now used freely very few people can know you, understand your strengths and weaknesses, or could have shared your experiences close enough to really empathize with you. So, while I could write this from the perspective of understanding and knowing what you are thinking right now, we know better. So, I would rather give you a few words from one person to another person who is about to go through what the former has already survived and the latter is about to tackle.

Moving from one level to another in anything is never easy, but it is not necessarily difficult. What is difficult is what you have to do to stay “on top of the mountain” once you have arrived at the summit. I imagine many of you feel like you have arrived, and you should. By making it to Hampton University you have beaten the odds and transcended a society of can’t into a world of possibilities. However, you need to be careful because in reality you have not done much just yet. Getting here was the easy part, staying here and excelling is difficult. It takes an education for life to excel. For most of you getting here was not easy, and you refuse to allow anyone to tell you can’t enjoy it. That is fine, but I remember a proverb that says the journey of 1000 miles begins with just one step. Well, I imagine that at mile 350 when you look back it seems like you have come a long way, but if you then look forward you realize that the next step to mile 351 is as daunting and important as the first step so long ago, because 650 miles is still a massive task to accomplish.

If there is anything I can say that will help you excel at our home by the sea it is stay focused and forever hungry. Treat your first like your last and your last like your first, as one Brooklyn rapper once said. A challenge a day will keep you having to go home angry away, so strive to excel at all aspects of your life at Hampton University. Of the twelve young men I hung out with regularly freshmen year in James Hall, I was the only one to keep my scholarship. We were all on scholarship. I was the only one to apply for Honors College. Some of the people that started with me, where you are now, are not with me today because they keep looking back instead of forward. I hope your dreams don’t allow you to make the same mistake. I look forward to working with all of you in the future, and make sure you always speak truth to power. Thank you.

A Lose, Lose, LOSE Election.

I consider myself a proud political junkie on the level of Pookie from New Jack City. I am a CNN addict, when things are going well during the day I suffer from political argument withdrawal, and I can’t seem to get enough of this year’s Presidential election cycle. The three politicians that remain had to survive an Odyssey’s like epic struggle to get here today, minus the Greek Gods and tempting sirens of course.

John McCain was all but dead just seven months, when he fired most of his campaign staff and was polling behind Ron Paul in states that he would eventually go on to win. Barak Obama, well he is black and that has its own built in obstacles, but he has had to say he is not Muslim so many times you would think he was a descendent of Syrian crusades conquer Saladin, first he wasn’t black enough then he was willing because he was black, and they even attacked him by attacking his pastor for God’s sake. As for Hillary, well lets us all remember that if New Hampshire voters were not being so politically independent all the time, or if it was not for Texas and Ohio remembering why they liked her in the first place, she may not be here today. Yes, this year’s presidential election certainly has had more twist and turns then a good Agatha Christie novel, and the best part is that they real July, 4 like fireworks haven’t even begun because the general election is still seven full moths away.

So, with the prospect of one of the Democratic candidates drooping out soon and then a winner coming out of the race between the Democrat and John McCain becoming President, I wanted to take a minute and assess what we might lose after election day rather then what we might win.

If Barak were to win the nomination the Democratic Party would lose one of its smartest politicians ever and the best chance to break that seemingly unreachable glass ceiling of having a woman in the oval office giving rather than taking. Hilary Clinton is just as smart as Obama and just as tough as McCain. Graduating from Wellesley College and then Yale Law School with better grades then President Clinton and having served on the board of directors of the Yale Review of Law and Social Action, she has survived the collapse of her health care plan, and the “other woman”. Should she not be President we miss the chance to see how a female leader of the free world would be received in Saudi Arabia or Iran. We miss the chance to see how a former President plays the role of CEO of the East Wing rather than the West. We also miss the chance to tell the world that, in this country were freedom reigns you don’t have to provide sperm to call the shots and enforce the laws. We miss the chance to give the women of America who cook our meals, change our dippers, and birth our future a voice that shares their unique experience. Survey the Democratic landscape, there seems to be few replacements for this historic figure in the horizon. Junior Senator Claire McCaskill from Missouri may be the only viable Democratic female perspective candidate, she is said to be on the long list if Senator Obama wins the nomination. However she was only elected in 2006, and has not been a Governor or Mayor to show executive experience.

If Hilary or McCain were to win the Democratic Party would lose the chance to anoint its best politician since President Clinton and President Kennedy before him. The dream seems to die if Barak does not win, and that is the perception whether you dream with him or not. I think it is fair to say that no one actual knows if Barak can bring the change he speaks of or the change we need. It is also fair to say that if he does not win the energy, excitement, and hope he has brought these last few mouths dies as well. The future perspectives of African American Presidential candidates are worse than that of the party’s perspectives for females. I can think of no current African American Congressmen, Mayor, or Governor that can come close to matching the story, skill, and genius of the Junior Senator from Illinois. If Barak loses in the primary or in the general election we has a country and a free society would have passed up a once in a life time opportunity to single to the world ( but mostly ourselves) that race does not matter and the American dream is real for all who are willing to work hard and seek it.

When the Democrats come out of the sandbox and pick a nominee if that nominee beats McCain America would lose its best chance to tell the far right that they don’t matter in American politics. Through the straight talk express has slowed as he has tried to “unite” his party, John McCain is his party’s best hope to move away from the ideal, zeal, zero substance politics of the Regan era and back to the moderate politics of Eisenhower. At 71, John McCain would bring a life time of American history and service that the Democratic candidates lack. If he loses the Republican Party’s far right would undoubtedly jump on the opportunity to say that a Republican coalition of independents and mainstream America cannot win, and that a need to move back to courting the religious right and extremely rich existed. Newly minted “super conservatives” are waiting in the wings for a Democratic blow out of 2008 to bring “their” party back to that all time religion. Should John McCain not be President we miss the opportunity to tell the world that moderates not extremist dominate America’s policy.

No matter what happens in November we all know, someone will lose. America while accruing a future will lose an opportunity to set right one of the many wrongs of its past, no matter who wins. One thing we can be sure of is that we are now living history and I for one am enjoying my front row seat, even if it means I cry at the end of this cliff hanger.

BY D.W

What kills more Black Boys then bullets, guns, or war?

As I read Tonyaa Weathersbee “Putting blacks in prison is latest legacy of slavery” from Black Voices in Commentary, I couldn’t help but think of another tragedy that is nothing more the minority genocide. It is true that the amount of balck people, especially balck males, incarcerated is dangerous and warrants our attention. However, what about the number one killer of balck men in America? No, I am not talking about bullets, gangs, marijuana, crack cocaine, white women, or fried chicken. I am talking about abortions, and as a read Ms. Weatherbee’s story I thought to myself that, rather than jail this is the next big problem black people will face.

Now, I am as liberal as anyone who is willing to call themselves liberal but when there is a problem out that affects a race of people ideology should go out the window. I consider myself pro-choice, I fully support gay marriage, and I believe in universal health care. So please don’t revoke my Democratic Party Plus card when I say that I think that abortion was one of just the many things produced by the feminist movement of the 1970’s that destroyed the Black American family. More than any of our brother and sisters locked up behind bars, abortion as it is used today has robbed the black race of opportunity and future. Now, I could tell you that about 1,200 African-American babies are killed by abortion in the United States every day. I could tell you that since abortion was legalized in 1973, more than 14 million African-American babies have been killed. I could tell you that something like 35% of all abortions in the United States are performed on African-American women, while they represent only 13% of the female population of this country. However, I rather tell you that abortion is a crutch we no longer can afford to use as contraception. Unlike jail that simple disenfranchises African Americans, the Black American use and abuse of abortions eradicates any chance of that potential African American child becoming a functional citizen at all. In a democratic society in which numbers equal power, jail is a stumbling stone while abortion has turned into the wall of Jericho. Young Black males need to stay out of jail, but once out of jail if they don’t become more productive citizens, if they don’t take responsibility for the lives they produce and affect, if they don’t stop killing their dreams before they have a chance to blossom, they might as well stay in jail because they will never be free. Slavery was designed not just to enslave the body, but the mind and the soul of the African. Slave masters beat the biggest Negro to death in front of the rest to prove they could. They raped the black women in front of her husband and her son’s to prove that the men were powerless to do anything about it. Now as we enter the 21^st century, if we as black males continue to perpetuate a situation in which makes abortion more instead of less necessary, we may as well be giving our women to slave master and we are still powerless to do anything about it.